So, the Shart Administration likes their little theme weeks. “Infrastructure Week” and “Golf and Naptime Week” and “Jesus Christ Can’t We Find Anyone on the Planet to Replace Reince Priebus Week.” Today was “Let’s Show the World What a Bunch of Bumbling, Brain-Dead, Malicious, Jagoffs We All Are” Day.
Friends, when you wake up to the news that a giant iceberg the size of Delaware has broken off from mainland Antarctica to roam the oceans, see the world, maybe record a freak-folk album…you know that shit is still all kindsa cray.
Well, usually there’s been a fair amount of insanity by this point of a Monday evening, but Fox News tells me that all everybody’s talking about is Smallhands Magoo picking up a hat the wind knocked off of a marine’s head, so I guess there’s nothin’ worth writing about, huh?
Well, at this point I really am quite certain I’m plugged into the Matrix and the news is being fed directly into my brain by an alien bug robot that is also an aspiring espionage novelist. If, however, all of this garbage is actually happening, then it must be said that shit, as has previously been noted, be cray.
Kinda quiet today, huh? With SCROTUS and so much of his team traveling to Europe, the air seemed a little sweeter, didn’t it? A little less…sharty, I guess is the word I’m looking for.
Anyway, the Living Garbage Pail Kid is in Poland by now, where the compliant right-wing government has promised to bus in a crowd full of ringers to cheer him and loudly proclaim the normalness of his hand size.
Hey there, folks. The insanity seems to be merely simmering this long holiday weekend, congress is in recess and Baron Golfin von Fatfuk merrily roams his natural habitat for a few extra days. But let’s check in real quick.
